For those that don’t know, my mom fell while on vacation a couple of weeks ago and broke her leg pretty badly. I wish I would have taken a picture of the CT scan to show the world (if she’d let me)—it’s pretty crazy. The crazier part is that after she fell, my dad and my mom had gone to the ER to get it looked at (because apparently it was clear to them she had broken it) but the ER people told my mom that although it was broken, it wasn’t displaced and that she wouldn’t need surgery (more on this in just a moment). So when they got back from their trip, I took my mom to the orthopedist to get it casted (it was only in a splint) and the orthopedist took new x-rays along with looking at the x-rays that were taken during the ER trip. He gave her a funny look and asked her what she was told in the ER. She repeated that she wouldn’t need surgery since it wasn’t displaced. This orthopedist was nice and said, “In my professional opinion, I’d highly like to disagree with them,” and showed us the x-rays from the ER. In those x-rays you could see it was displaced. In the x-rays that were taken at the orthopedist’s office you could see that it was still displaced…so she was told she’d need surgery and was referred to Doctor #1. Doctor #1 had her get a CT scan before she came to see him and the CT scan revealed more than just plain x-rays had. From the CT, Doctor #1 was able to see that just a plain rod with plates and screws weren’t going to fix the issue…she was going to need an external fixture to stabilize it for about a week until the swelling went down and THEN they could put in plates and screws. Here is a picture of kind of what it looks like…although move the top part to the middle of her shin and the bottom part to her ankles...I just wanted to use something less graphic for those that have sensitive stomaches...so here is this pic of something like what she had:
SOURCE: www.meditechvisualaids.com/3d-animations/single-gallery/2746503
But, Doctor #1 doesn’t do external fixtures, so she was referred to Doctor #2. Doctor #2 is a foot/leg trauma specialist and he is REALLY good at what he does. So we were able to get in to see Doctor #2 and she had her first surgery on June 1 to put the external fixture on. That was a HARD day for me. I didn’t sleep much the two nights before the surgery, so the morning of the surgery I was emotionally and physically exhausted. My dad was stressed and nervous so I was also feeding off of his energy. Both of us were trying to hold it together while we spent the better half of the day waiting for my mom to go into surgery. (She was an “add on” to the schedule because she didn’t get to see Doctor #2 before the next day’s surgery schedule was put together so we had to wait to see if there was room in the day for the surgery).
At around 4 pm she was wheeled down to the pre-op room and we waited there for her to be taken back to surgery. The whole time I was choking back tears. I was trying to trust the hospital staff (surgeons, nurses, and everyone else involved in it). My biggest fear is losing my mom. I know that no one (personally) in my life that is like, “man, I really hope that my mom dies today,” but my mom and I have come a LONG way in the last few years to where I can call her my mom AND friend. Before she was just my mom…but going to college, getting married, and growing up has really changed my perspective on the relationship with my mom—also watching my mom with her mom as her mom was struggling with Alzheimer’s really changed me too. But now that Mark and I are in the process of adopting so that he can be a dad and I can be a mom—my mom means even more to me. I don’t want to go into motherhood without my mom rallying beside me. I couldn’t imagine my mom not being there when we bring home our little one and being there to teach me the ways of motherhood. So I think watching her get wheeled back into surgery was hard. I knew that everything was out of my hands and I just had to trust the staff and mostly, trust God that things would work the way they were supposed to work out-but I wanted them to work out in my favor…with my mom having a great surgery coming out to work on healing her leg, and to have her there for the future.
The week after her first surgery, I was at a function with a lot of extended family and family friends. One of my aunts had said, “You’ve gone from your mom’s enemy to best friend in a matter of years—it’s pretty crazy.” And I don’t know if she really knew the impact of the words she said in passing, but it was an interesting statement. I’ll readily admit that in middle school I really didn’t want to be my mom’s friend. She was the one that laid the rules down (along with my dad…but I’m focusing on my mom for now). I think it was more of a parent role that she played rather than a friend role—but that worked. I believe that you need to be a parent first to your kid, then a friend—but it shouldn’t be the other way around. In high school I had a great adult mentor in my life who was my friend and I didn’t see the need to share things with my parents in the way that I shared with my mentor. It worked—but if I could go back in time, I wish that the friendship I now have with my mom would have started way sooner. Now that I am an adult and married, my viewpoint has changed. My mom and I have a lot more in common and we share life together. All that to say is I cannot imagine (nor do I want to imagine) my life without my mom for a long time! I know one day that she will pass away…but I’m hoping that will be very far away…when she is at least 110 years and has great-great grandchildren!!! :)
While my mom has had the external ficture on her leg, she hasn’t really been able to do much—she can’t really. I go over every day to wash her hair and spend time with her. It’s been nice for her to have to stay home from work as I’ve been able to spend more than normal time with her. I’m sure she is ready to go back to work—however she has a few more weeks before that can happen, so I’ll soak up the extra time while I can get it. It has been fun that I get to join her to doctor appointments, hair appointments and just the moments I sit on the couch and hang out with her.
Today my mom is having her second surgery. She is getting the external fixture taken off and the plates and screws put in her leg. I wasn’t quite as nervous for this surgery as I was for the first only because we just went through this 1.5 weeks ago, but it’s still the underlying fear of losing my mom too early. It’s my MOM and I only have one of them and I’m protective of her…hear my ROAR! :)
I am so thankful that I have a great mom who works hard at what she does and has allowed me to become her friend. She is someone I can call when I’m upset or when something really happy happens and everything in between. Sometimes I’m sure I call her too much—but she takes it well.
That’s all for today…I just wanted to put it out there that I have a great mom and I’m thankful that I get to spend the rest of my life being friends with her :)
